Marked Not Broken

We should never underestimate the power of truly listening. Too often, we listen simply to respond, rather than to understand. We hear the words someone is saying, but are we genuinely listening to what they are trying to communicate? Listening goes beyond our ears — it also involves our eyes. We pick up on body language, tone, and presence. Does the person seem distressed? Do they appear happy or withdrawn? Often, we can sense these things without a single word being spoken.

For approximately 16 years, Tom worked in community services, including youth drug and alcohol support in Sydney, followed by six years working in homelessness services here in Adelaide. One of the most powerful lessons he learned was the importance of listening — not talking, not trying to fix the problem, and not offering advice — but actively listening. He saw firsthand the remarkable change in someone’s demeanour when they truly feel heard. When people feel listened to, they feel valued. They feel that someone genuinely cares. And the most powerful part of listening is that anyone can do it. You don’t need a degree, you don’t need to be highly paid, and you don’t even need to know the person. Taking the time to listen demonstrates compassion, and it shows the other person that they matter enough for you to stop and be present with them.

When questions are needed, asking open-ended questions helps someone expand on what they are experiencing, rather than limiting them to a simple “yes” or “no.” Another valuable practice is reflective listening — repeating back what someone has said. This not only shows that you are truly listening, but also gives the person the opportunity to clarify or correct what they mean. If something isn’t clear, there is no harm in asking for clarification. It ensures that both people are on the same page. Patience is key — don’t rush someone. Allow them to open up at their own pace and in their own way.

Tom also found, particularly when working with young people, that some of the best conversations happened while walking side by side, rather than sitting face-to-face. For many, direct eye contact can feel overwhelming or intimidating. Walking together, or sharing a simple activity one-on-one, can ease the pressure and make it easier for someone to talk.

At the end of the day, if someone trusts you enough to open up, we owe it to them to give them our time — and to simply listen

For more information on Active Listening, you can visit here

If you have concerns for someone’s wellbeing, the following information may be helpful, please visit here